Monday, May 21, 2012

To See, or Not to See?

I am learning to see the world differently. 
People aren't who I originally presume they are, and things aren't always what they seem.
Oh gosh, who am I kidding.
I really just need my contacts back. 
That's the bottom line.
I have been blind(ish) for nearly a week now and it's really been an event. Really. Thursday of last week I woke up with one eye swollen shut and the other less than open. I must say, I just managed to get into public and back out again with my mortal self intact. Then, of course, I couldn't really wear my contacts for a day or so, and after that I was a stellar student and managed to leave them at Sydney's. I always did get the gold star in school. To make matters worse, I cannot for the life of me find my store of contacts. I've had boxes of them for a while now, but they've been lost in the madness that is my room. And have you ever tried searching with all of your heart and soul for something you can only find by physically seeing when you really, in all reality, can't see? It's... difficult to say the least and infuriating, to be more accurate. My efforts were fruitless, I now have a bruise on my hip, and I remained blind. This made Church services on Sunday especially interesting. Whoever was on the stand had to be announced, otherwise I interpreted their shape, size, and hair color as the first person who's physical description could potentially meet the given criteria. The meeting was lovely. My childhood friend led the music, while grandma played the organ and Teddy Roosevelt conducted with opening and closing statements.
I really need to invest in a pair of glasses.

Saturday, May 12, 2012

I Grew in the Sight of the Sun

"Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair."
~Kahlil Gibran


 It is more important to be gently great than to be so untouchable by that which is honestly and purely good. Balance is one of the most sought after traits yet one of the fewest recognized attributes. Those who have a level head often make the wisest decisions.
I have found few things that make me feel whole as much as enjoying the earth does. 
I was meant to spend much of my time out of doors, with nothing to shut me in or alter my environment. Nothing satisfies like a walk or a run through the original, clean, wonderful state of things. I grew up in the sight of the sun. That singular, warm, golden eye that gives life and energy to all it surveys. My feet want nothing more than to feel the gritty shifts and green whispers of the changing grounds and grasses. And I must resist the urge to hide the fact that, as the earth dirties and callouses my soles, it cleanses and smooths the rough edges of my inner self. Of my soul.
I long to feel no concern at the marketability of the world around me.
I only wish to value and experience it.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

.....To Catch My Breath


I find my energy stores to be quickly evaporating. Which is quite distressing. I am at a bit of an impasse as to wether or not I should rest it off or try to vigorously work it from my system. I'm determined to ride it out, one way or another.
I have to ride it out. 
I don't have options here.
There is no other choice.


I feel...kind of like Timmy probably did when he had fallen down the well.
Only, my parents never let me have a dog, growing up. 
Sorry, Lassie, but you're out of context here.


Tomorrow I am going to sleep in.
Wake up.
Get ready for the day.
Go to work.
Come home.
Make food.
And deal with it like a big girl.


It is going to be a good day.
I am going to be happy with it.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

{Nothing} Can Be Very Time Consuming

I love having an empty schedule. It means that I can do whatever I want, whenever I want to. Assuming that it is practical, of course. And sometimes, I just like to sit and experience what it is to be exactly who I am at this particular moment in time. 
Today is a content day. 
Of a drift on the wind and roll down the river sort.

Isn't it wonderful that I am in possession of the ability to change the world?
Isn't it wonderful that we all are?
Wether or not we choose to do so at any given moment is entirely up to us.
I will wait for the wisdom to know what for and why I will fight.
The bigger battles are the ones that require the most thought.