Friday, September 6, 2013

Essentially, I'm Sorry.

When a relationship unravels it's not the end. The end is a choice. You or the other party has to make choices that define an ending. 

I'm about to elaborate.

An unraveling is painful and can be catastrophic, yes. A gaping wound anchored in the pit of your being and radiating outward. When in this condition or similar I am led to believe that we revert back to more primal instincts. Wether our mind thrusts these upon us to distract from the injury or we do it consciously, I have noticed patterns accompanying emotional disruption. Binge eating, lust, fatigue, great desire for material possession, indescribable anger, unreasonable envy, and monumental pride. All seven just as deadly as they were before. However, in this case, gluttony is no longer merely a sin but a symptom. An effect of a damaged sense of emotional wellness. 

Symptoms of an emotional nature must be tempered in a way that will not only treat the underlying issue, but will also eradicate the urge to react in manners destructive to ones relationship with others. For example, when a mother and a child argue over the child's ability to exercise independence in a way that exhibits maturity and the child storms off, refusing to admit fault, greater damage is done. Pride and anger take the stage and we see the rift grow in consequence. This rift will remain in place until such a time that one or both parties are drawn to soften and yield to admittance, forgiveness, and assumption of responsibility. Using these they can bridge the gap that time will gradually fill in. 

Consider time as one would consider the elements: unpredictable, and wearing on surroundings. Should the building of the bridge be delayed there are multiple variables that may have effect on the uneven grounds before repairs are able to be made. Case A being that it may fill very gradually as time goes on, with case B being that it may deepen or fill with impassable emotion. In either scenario, time and connection that might have been spared if but for an effort are lost. 
Communication is paramount in any interpersonal relation. The ability to discuss rationally as well as passionately should be a trait sought out by those endeavoring to form a solid bond. 

Humanity recognizes these attributes as virtues. Therefore it strengthens a relationship when the foundation is inclusive of not only the initial bond forged between two people, but the continuation of that bond through patient analysis of any disruption. This should then be tempered by the deeper knowledge of one another which should then be taken into consideration as the bond is reinforced and made anew. Over time, the gradual breaking down and repairing of a relationship is comparable to that of a muscle. When done properly, efforts will be rewarded with renewed and increased strength. When injured, successful recovery and improvement is possible, but requires patience and attention. 

I am not perfect and am so fortunate to have someone who is willing to acknowledge that in a loving way. I hope and endeavor to become a wiser, thoughtful, and well rounded person. I thank those who remind me of this and assist me in my goals.